


Calm

by Little_Bear_8864



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Fluff, If You Squint - Freeform, Panic Attacks, Tsukiyama - Freeform, during practice, headphones, ooc tsukishima, the calm playlist, ukai is a good coach
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:21:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23894479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Little_Bear_8864/pseuds/Little_Bear_8864
Summary: Coach Ukai helps Tsukishima through a panic attack during practice.TW: Panic attacks
Relationships: slight tsukiyama
Comments: 4
Kudos: 62





	1. Headphones

**Author's Note:**

> I took a break from writing because I wasn't getting any inspiration, and i needed to improve my writing style. But here we are, with another angsty one-shot!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another angsty drabble
> 
> TW: panic attacks

> 3rd POV
> 
> He shouldn’t be freaking out, not now. But here he was, curled up on the gym floor, crying his eyes out in front of everyone. “Tsukishima, can you hear me?” asked a voice, probably Daichi. He opened his eyes slowly, glancing up at the face in front of him. Surprisingly, Coach Ukai stared back. He felt a hand pressed to his back and had to resist the urge to flinch. “Okay Tsukishima, I need you to breathe, okay? Can you do that?” The middle blocker nodded. Ukai moved his hand up and down the teens back, in an attempt to calm him further. Tsukishima was trying, he really was. But it felt like someone was squeezing the air out of his lungs and he couldn't take any air back.
> 
> * * *
> 
> It took about five minutes for the coach to realize something. “Yamaguchi, do you know where Tsukishima”s headphones are?” asked the coach. “Y-yeah. They’re in the club room.” said the dark-haired boy nervously. He was inching his way closer, afraid to get too close. “Okay, get them for me please.” Yamaguchi nodded and ran to the club room. He’d noticed Tsukishima wearing them whenever he was walking to the clubroom. He turned back to the mentally strained teen. “Yamaguchi is going to get your headphones, okay?” asked Ukai. Tsukishima only nodded, squeezing his eyes shut. He hadn’t expected anything more, seeing how the kid still hadn’t relaxed.
> 
> * * *
> 
> Yamaguchi came running back with silver headphones and phone in hand. He sat down next to his friend and quickly unlocked the phone, plugging the headphones in. Ukai took the headphones and fitted them over the middle blocker’s ears. Yamaguchi opened the music app and tapped on a playlist labeled ‘Calm’. Tsukishima visibly relaxed and slowly opened his eyes. Yamaguchi’s hand slowly crept to Tsukishima’s, lightly squeezing. Yamaguchi gave a small smile and slowly, Tsukishima began to calm down. He sat up, embarrassed. When he met the eyes of the team, he smiled. _His team_.


	2. Realization

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> im here again with the aftermath

3rd POV

Tsukishima walked into practice the next day with his head tilted down. Whatever reassurance he had left the gym with last night was stripped away. It was his fault, after all. He had stayed up all night overthinking, as he always does about how he had embarrassed himself in front of the entire team in the evening before. He had dark bags under his eyes and his movements were sluggish. Tadashi had asked about it when they met at the corner to walk to school that morning but he brushed it off as reading too late into the night. He didn't seem to belive him, but he didn't pressure him anymore. He stumbled(with confidence, of course) into the clubroom, drawing the attention of Nishinoya and Hinata. He ignored their looks and proceeded to take off his headphones and set his bag down. "Hey, um...Tsukishima..." started Nishinoya. "What do you want, Nishinoya?" snapped the blocker, words sounding harsher than he wanted them to. "Ijustwantedtoknowwhyyoursosadallthetime!" Tsukishima was shocked, Tadashi right behind him. _Was he really that transparent?_ He was slipping, he thought. Why would he ask that, of all things? **Why, did he care?** No, what a childish thought. No one was supposed to actually give a crap. Part of him wanted to believe what he was interpreting. But the bigger part of him, his mental survival was telling him to push them all away and protect himself. He finished changing and walked out of the door, Yamaguchi following him out.

* * *

Weeks went on as usual, standing next to Yamaguchi, being a total dick to everyone who tried to start a conversation with him. One day, while getting a drink during one of the breaks in practice, a particularly sad thought crossed his mind. _You missed all those spikes. How pathetic is that?_ He cursed his mind for doing this during practice, of all places. He took a few steps back and hit the wall, slowly sliding down it to the ground. _NO. NONONONONONO NOTAGAINNOTAGAINNOTAGA-_ "Tsukishima! _"_ Said boy whipped his head up to meet Tanaka's face. Shit, he did it again. Stupid brain. "You ok, you look a little different," Tsukishima mustered a deadpan face and stared at the spiker. I seemingly worried vice-captain behind him and Yamaguchi making his way over. _Great, more people to see how pathetic I am._ But then he realized Tanaka was right. The team saw him differently now. No longer was the calm, cool dickhead facade he put on every day. Now they saw the depressed, lonely, pathetic side of him. He swiftly got up and made a beeline for the door. "TSUKISHIMA WAIT!" Was that Sugawara? He stopped, only out of curiosity, and turned around. "Can we do anything to help?" asked the setter. "I'm fine," replied the blocker. He then slipped out the door before anyone could say anything else. _He'll be fine. He's done it before._ He thought. Yeah. He'll go home and try to go sleep, fail, and wait for his iPod to die so he has an excuse to get up and 12 at night. He changed and was walking out when Yamaguchi surprised him outside the door of the clubroom. "Where are you going?" asked Tadashi. "Home." was the simple answer he gave him. "Well if you're not gonna stay for practice, then at least let me walk home with you." inquired the pinch server. The blonde only sighed and nodded, and waited outside the door for Yamaguchi to finish changing. When he walked out, the two met each other with an awkward silence. "Well, let's go," said Tsukishima, cause if it was anything he hated other than the idea of trust it was awkward silences. They started walking to the corner, where they would part ways and go home. "Do you think I could come over today?" asked Yamaguchi. Tsukishima wasn't particularly surprised by the question, but he nodded and continued walking. "You're not fine and we both know it.," piped Yamaguchi, making his childhood friend stumble. Now that statement he was not prepared for. "I know." replied the blonde when he finally regained his footing. "Your not pathetic. Your cool and smart. Sometimes you're a shitty person but you're not pathetic." said the green-haired boy, as if he read Tsukishima's mind. This made said boy stop in his tracks and stare at him. "What makes you think that," retorted Tsukishima. "It's true," said Tadashi. "Trust me, Tsukki," he added when he was met with silence. MAybey he was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading


End file.
